I always imagined that in the moments of absolute happiness you feel insight, awareness, harmony, and like your life will no longer be the same. All of these are lies! Yesterday I remained unenlightened: I do not know what is a dream life, a dream job, a dream house, but after what I realized is, it’s all just pointless and unimportant! Because I was happy.
First off, I’d like to say that for happiness it doesn’t matter where you are. In my case, I was in Palanga, Lithuania, on the beach, in a gently cool, still sunny evening, alone with myself. But another thing made me happy: after always having a nagging anxiety, deep down, I stopped being afraid. That’s all. I ceased to be afraid that my hands would not be washed off from the smoked Baltic fish — and I moaned from the gastronomic pleasure, and then ran to wash them in the sea. The fact that mites jumped on me from my dog. The fact that I would burn in the sun and would walk with a red nose when normally I wouldn’t show my face to my boyfriend until the nose cleared up (maybe he likes me even with a red nose? Well, I won’t flatter myself so far and won’t show.) The fact that the pants are visible over the top of my jeans when sitting and splashing in the seawater, that someone will hear how I sing stupid songs, that the policeman will drive me away for that bottle of beer, that my pup will run away, that the sand will be everywhere, that I’ll get fat after this pack of chips, that the war will begin while I’m ashore, that my passport will be stolen, that my money will run out, that I can’t do anything, that life goes by, that the phone will die, that my postcards will arrive crumbled, that the ants will crawl into my ear.
The sea. The sun. To eat with my hands.
And do not be afraid of anything.
P.S. If you feel the absolute happiness remember: never, never, never, never buy an ice cream to become even better. Superfluous.
P.P.S. O.K., maybe you should, it was delicious too.
When did you let go of your fears? Share it in the comments below.